All I’ve done
All I’ve felt was leading to this
All I’ve known
All I’ve done
All I’ve felt was leading to this
Wanna stay right here
‘Til the end of time ’till the earth stops turning
I’m gonna love you till the seas run dry
I’ve found the one I’ve waited for
My mother was getting hysterical and I needed to exit fast.
I grabbed my bags and the car keys and prepared myself for a drive to the trainstation.
There was no way I would stay in Minnesota, away from you for a day longer.
She couldn’t hold me back, no one would.
A voice screams out from the window above me while I stood in the warm September night.
“You’re a bitch, but I’ll take you.”
I breathed a sigh of relief, already I was closer to you. I didn’t utter a word the whole
drive to the train station.
I didn’t care about anyone but you.
My every thought was on you, and I didn’t stop to think how crazy
I was until days after I met you.
When I arrived at the trainstation I heard whistling. Not the whistle of the train, but whistling from a song.
A familiar song, one we had shared in the past and the words from the song
“All we care about is talking, talking only me and you…”
I smiled and sat down reassured warm, happy.
The train ride itself was a bit of a blur. I took in the strange haunted sights of Montana, and the beauty of Oregon. My first sight of California took my breath away. When the train reached Emeryville. I started to panic. What if you didn’t like me? I put on my make up, half excited, and pale with fear. I tied that ribbon around my neck, that I wore in my hair on your birthday. It was a last minute idea, but I knew you would like it.
I walked slowly, tried to remember to breathe, but found it difficult. I remember looking around the trainstation
and also staring down at the pavement self consciously.
“YO ADRIAN” a voice yelled at me from a few feet away. I stopped and turned around quickly.
oh. you! I turned around and began to walk away. Frightened, my first thought was flight.
I knew it was you. But I was too frightened to speak or even look at you for long.
You got up from the steps and walked toward me. Swagger. Big-Smile. Confident. Armsstretchedouttoinfinity. Your dark clothes made you contrast beautifully with the sunny bright day. I can still picture you in my mind. The way you smiled, smelled, how you nearly broke my rib cages with a death grip hug, that I couldn’t help but return to you. That awkward first kiss. Following you and wondering what I had gotten myself into as I stumbled behind you. Watching you intently. I gave you the ribbon which you proudly displayed on the firebird-rearview-mirror. I studied the writing on the card you gave to me of two kids walking on the beach.
You drove around doing your best to scare the hell out of me with crazy driving,
almost ran over a few pedestrians.
I laughed. Still self conscious, but doing my best to take in the sights…
and most especially my new and only friend.
My Crazy, Mad-cap, Looneyboy.
2,000 miles couldn’t stop us, jealous friends and hysterical families, couldn’t either.
My fear of failure didn’t get in the way,
homelessness, cops, court dates, hunger, sleeping in freezing temperatures, illness couldn’t stop us. And nothing will. We’re unbeatable. A force of nature, urgent.
And still with all that we’ve been through, I think often of the first day of that hotel room in Redwood City, CA.
Where I kissed you, looked into your eyes and knew
that I couldn’t walk
away
from you ever again, or in any direction but towards you. I’ve found the one I’ve waited for.
I love you my sweet, smiling, laughing, loving looneyboy.
I’ve been so excited since I knew I was gonna be with you
Now everyday the sun will shine on me from your eyes
I’m on a train to you and it’s just not fast enough
One Comment
You are my beautiful.
I still remember the night you told me to come and get you. My pulse raced over the smile that broke over my face and I swear if some bits and pieces of that song didn’t fly through my whirling head. As I pondered how to fly to you.
I’d send a train for my looneygirl. And save the best flight for when you got here.
What you went through to get to me – your whole journey here: I’ll never forget. You never looked back, and I knew we were soulmates. A story upon a story unfolded that day, and more still will unfold upon those days, my Eve. Petals. 7/14 was the day we were born into Garden of Eros. 9/14 was the day the gods said, “Now: love and play!.
Absolutely beautiful song; you find the ones that speak so perfectly. The video it’s put to, too: from the b&w shots, to the curling, twisting, playful pose at the end…mmm. We need a name for that. The Soulmate Twist? Crabus Undulatus. I know a couple that does it even better than them, but, you know. And you know I know.
You’re the One I’ve found.